Memories to Last a Lifetime

Last full day in England and we had a lot of stuff to pack into it. We had to clean up the flat and pack our suitcases so we were ready to be out the next morning no later than 7:00am to get to Gatwick. After tidying up for about 45 minutes (with Declan bouncing off the walls) we got ourselves together and went out for our last day of exploring in London.
I decided that we should pay a visit to Buckingham Palace as we had not been there as of yet.

The flat was only a 10 minute walk from the Royal Mews so we legged it over. Declan was amazed at how big everything was and loved being able to climb up no the Victoria Memorial Fountain. That was until a police officer told me that he should get down as it wasn’t safe. I thought that funny considering some of the other activities I watched people doing but in the end he has a job to so whatever.

The Queen was in residence so Declan waved at the castle in case she saw him which I thought was incredibly cute. We tossed some of my loose change into the fountain to lighten my pockets since I hate bringing coins back from abroad and headed off through St. James Park.

The whole area was under construction since we were only 3 weeks away from the Royal Wedding so there were paths that could be taken and paths that were forbidden. It also seemed that there were a large amount of school groups in the area and I have to say that I am amazed at how inconsiderate some of those punks can be. They walk 5 abreast on a path and expect you to walk around them. I wasn’t having any of it and shouldered through two separate groups almost dropping one kid when he realized that I wasn’t moving.
Declan was so busy running through the grass he never noticed thank goodness. I tried to keep him off the grass because they can be really testy about that sort of thing but in the end it was no use. He was in his element and loving it.

We eventually made our way to Charing Cross Station and boarded a train for Sidcup to have one last visit with my Grandmother before having dinner with my Uncle and his family. I was looking forward to both as I hadn’t seen my Uncle Tim since my Grandfather passed and I have always enjoyed speaking with him and his lovely wife Carol.

Upon arrival at my Grandmother’s we were ushered in and had a wonderful visit. We were able to Skype Andrea’s parents so that she was able to actually see Rhys while he was awake and smiling which I think she really appreciated. Declan was content to sit on the floor and watch a movie on the laptop between having little chats with Grandma and eating as many of her oranges as he possibly could. I don’t think that afternoon could have gone any better.
When Tim and Carol arrived to take us over to the restaurant Declan immediately took to them. Walking over to the restaurant was funny because they were more concerned about him than I was. I know what his limits are and how adventurous he can be but I also know that he is sensible and cautious.

We had a wonderful meal with Tim, Carol and her daughter Leanne and her family. Declan enjoyed meeting more cousins and was sat with their two daughters who fought over who was going to play with him. It was funny to watch to say the least. We had a wonderful meal with good conversation and were able to catch up as best as possible which was really nice. By the time all was said and done we got back to the flat around 8:30pm that night and had a relatively early night.

I am not going to go too far into the flight home as it was a bit of a nightmare and in all honesty it would take too long. Needless to say, we were delayed for over 5 hours and had boarded, disembarked, re-boarded and then sat in an airplane with no power over that whole time. The only saving grace about that whole experience was that Declan was amazing. He took it all in stride and never real got upset about the whole thing. If I had been travelling on my own I probably would have lost my mind but for him it was just another part of the whole adventure. How could I get upset with that? So didn’t.

It’s been just shy of two months since we had our big trip. I have called it my first real opportunity to be alone with my son, my first father-son trip and an exceptional opportunity for my oldest son to meet his Great-Grandmother as well as others in his family. I feel as though I was able to provide him with some sense that he is part of a family that is bigger than what he has here which was my goal. I was able to show him that although family may be far away in miles they can be close to heart. I think that he understands that in his own way since he still speaks of his cousins and the fun that he had playing with them. He asks me occasionally if I remember that day he played in the park with his cousins, or if I remember when we went to Great-Grandma Carroll’s flat. I don’t think that I can ask for anything more of this trip than that.

INGERLAND, INGERLAND, INGERLAND!

Day 5

This was the second most important day in the trip next to visiting my Grandmother (no offense to anyone else that we visited). Declan and I were going to WEMBLEY to see England v. Ghana. For anyone who knows me this was the pinnacle of football for me. Wembley is the cathedral of international football and I was going there with my son. It gives me goosebumps just thinking about it still.

Since the game was going to be a late one we

got up early and had a good run around London. I decided that since we had been doing everything for me so far I would surprise Declan with a trip to Hamley's Toy Store. This store has been there for over 250 year

s! It is 5 stories of crack for kids! Declan loved it. We spent over an hour in there just looking and playing with stuff.

We also decided that this was where Declan would find what to get Rhys. It took about 45 minutes and many different ideas but eventually Declan decided that Rhys would love a train from a show called Chuggington. He was right too! Rhys loves the thing.

After all the excitement I was able to convince Declan that we should have nap without much difficulty.

We woke up with

enough time to get ourselves ready for the big game and headed to the tube. After 3o minutes we arrived at Wembley Park station and got off. We walked down Wembley Way and I was blown away at how brilliantly the stadium is framed from

there.

It took about 15 minutes to walk to the stadium and we went in to get our tickets. Once they were picked up we went to the shop and looked around for some England gear. Declan was adamant that he did not want a shirt but I was able to get get him a scarf. I was able to get a great England Shirt for next to nothing and they put on the England v. Ghana crest for free! It looks fantastic!

We grabbed some grub and waited for the gates to open. We were first in line at our gate. Once in we took 5 escalators up to our seats and had a great view of the pitch.

The Ghanaian fans were incredible and though they were a minority you wouldn't know it from the noise they made. Once God Save the Queen beganit was mesmerizing. Goosebumps and tears in the eyes territory. So cool.e at our gate and really excited to get in. Once in we went up 5 escalators and got to our seats. It was so freaking cool to be in Wembley while it was empty.

The game itself was great. It was end to end with both sides getting great chances. England's first goal was even scored by a Carroll! How awesome to have a Carroll score the first goal I ever witnessed live at Wembley.

Declan was right into it as well. There was a little boy in front of us who knew all t

he songs and Declan just copied him and sang along with him for the game. H

We left with about 10 minutes remaining because I wanted to avoid the massive sea of people trying to get to the tube. We made it in no time and the train was pretty empty. We got home by about 10:00pm and hit the sack. It was one of the most fulfilling days we had of together.e was so good and I was so proud of him. We were in a crowd of 90 000 and he didn't even care. He loved it!

Ah Family, You Can't Pick 'Em Can You?

Family has been on my mind quite a bit lately. I mean extended family, Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, Cousins.... the whole lot. This is partially because Declan and I are travelling to England in a week to meet some of my Family and I am excited but there is a undercurrent of concern there as well. You never know what you are going to get. The Canadian side of my Family are outsiders with the English side. This is through no malice or forethought I am sure but through separation. We aren't a part of the everyday goings on of life in England so we are not part of some of the petty arguments are the large issues that are unresolved.

As such I feel I have to delicately map out the time that I have to try and insure that there are no slights. Please don't misinterpret that I think my coming is a major event for anyone, I am sure that it isn't. It is just an honest effort to see my Grandmother and have her meet her Great-Grandson. I don't want to create any problems.

I have cousins that I have never met and we are all adults. I think that is preposterous. I have had more contact with cousins in Australia than I have had with some in England. That is preposterous and I want to try and fix that.

I find the same issues with Family over here. We attended an event last night and I found myself calling my Mother to find out who was attending and who wasn't so that I could be prepared for any cold shoulders that may be turned my way. None of the invited guests were of the cold shoulder variety and all in attendance were incredibly happy catch up with us and see how our kids are growing.

This is what Family should be. I find it disheartening to think that you need to prepare yourself for an event of any kind in the anticipation of problems but I find it necessary nonetheless. I have been assured in the past that nothing would happen if certain individuals were in attendance but there always the discretionary, "if anything did happen it would be handled appropriately.". That unfortunately is not good enough. The fact that there are omissions in the invites speaks volumes at these events.

What am I getting at? I find it unfortunate that in the end events occur that require the elimination of relations with certain members of any Family. In my specific case I find it unfortunate that my children will probably not have the chance to know their full families. I however am also relieved that my children will not be subjected to the vitriolic and venomous confrontations that I witnessed growing up. No family is perfect, we all have little ugly secrets that we wish would stay hidden. When my children are old enough to start asking questions I won't hesitate to explain the reasons that I made the decisions that I made regarding the family that they met growing up. When they are old enough they can then make the decision to reach out to those family members if they so wish. Just as I am doing now.