Sunday, October 16, 2011

I love my kids

I love my kids. I really do. Andrea and I have found that adding a third to the mix has been both rewarding and challenging to say the least. Two is easy compared to three. I have had a lot of people tell me that once you get past three it becomes easy again if you decide to have more. I think they are full of it.

When I say I love my kids I mean it in the most sincere way. I can tell you right now though that there are days where I don’t like them much. Such as days when none of them listen to a word that either of us say or days when all I hear is the whining and whimpering over the littlest thing. “Daddy, Rhys took my puzzle piece” or “Declan took my truck”. Let’s be honest, there are more trucks and puzzles then I care to think about. Unfortunately there is no reasoning with them when these situations occur.

Yesterday Leighton and I had a bit of a misunderstanding. He didn’t realize that when having his bum changed he shouldn’t pee or poop. I didn’t realize that as a six week old he hasn’t quite grasped this concept. In the span of 5 minutes he almost peed in his own face, almost had and explosive bowel movement all over me and our bed, and then almost peed in his own face again! It definitely was not one my more stellar moments as I said to Andrea, “This going very poorly for me right now!” I seem to recall also saying, “Oh geez, I’m panicking!” Hilarity ensued. Eventually he got cleaned up. No one got hurt in the process so that it is good.

We have found that going out to supper has become fraught with trouble. One doesn’t want to eat anything on the menu or only wants to eat what is on someone else’s plate and the other just wants to go the bathroom 5 times to check it out.

Last night we were asked to go to supper for Andrea’s Father’s birthday. We gladly accepted and hoped that by going with the Grandparents the boys may behave a bit better we would not be in as much trouble as we have been lately. Boy were we wrong.

Dinner was at the Mandarin in Burlington which is a Chinese Buffet for those who don’t know. It is considered one of the best one’s around and is always busy at dinner time. We chose a good time as we were there earlier than most diners so it wasn’t as busy as it would be later. The boys started out alright but it eventually went downhill.

Rhys had a small throw up off garlic bread that set the tone. His diaper then leaked and I had to change it which was a joy. Picture a men’s bathroom with urinals across one wall and then on the opposite wall next to the stalls there is a diaper change table. Picture me in front of that table squatting on the ground to get Rhys’ new pants pulled up and put his shoes back on. Now picture a grown mad coming in and deciding to use the urinal directly behind me even though there were 3 others that were vacant. This man’s derriere was approximately half a foot from the back of my head. Very pleasant. What possesses someone to do that? Really.

Halfway through the meal Declan began looking a little worse for the wear and was starting to choke. It was decided that we would hurriedly pay and get out of there in case he actually threw up. We made a bee-line for the doors but when we got to the lobby it was absolutely packed. Andrea’s Dad must have excused himself 20 times to get people out of the way.

It was no use. We got the big revolving door and Declan threw up right in front of it. Ah buffet vomit, how wonderful.

Andrea’s Dad continued to try and get Declan out through the revolving door and Andrea followed closely behind with Rhys. Unfortunately Rhys got stuck in the door. Half of his body was inside the door and half was out. Poor kid, he looked really distressed and scared. Andrea’s Dad had no idea why the door was jammed so he continued to push which just made it worse unfortunately. Poor Poppa.

Once we got him out we advised the restaurant of the accident and quickly high-tailed it out of there.

When we got back to Andrea’s parents house the boys perked up and everyone was fine. We could laugh about the whole thing but it was really a rough end to a pretty good meal.

A little while later we were in the living room and Rhys was near the rocking chair. I am not certain how but ended up smashing his nose on the arm of the chair and had a quick whine about it. I checked him out immediately and he seemed to be fine so he went on playing and laughing. About a minute we realized that he was actually bleeding from the nose so we frantically tried to stopped the bleeding while keeping him calm. We all know that kids won’t freak out as long as they don’t see the blood or see people panicking. Eventually we got the bleeding to stop and decided that the day was done. We went home and called it a night.

I love my kids, I really do. Yesterday, I didn’t like them much. I am eagerly awaiting my Father of the Year award.

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